Easter!

Hey guys... It's me - Sonia.

I woke up this morning Thankful!!! I am so thankful for my Pastor, church, family, home, friends.... I know lately life for me has not been the best, and I've only been able to see what's "wrong" with my life. And how horrible it is. And then, Gods grace, mercy and love reaches out to me through His Word, and reminds me - sonia you ..... you..... He's got it all under control!!! WHY OH WHY do i torture myself??? who knows. possible cos i'm just a silly human. flesh. But, I know as long as I keep doing what's right, and praising Him for HIM, He's got it all under control. Pastor preached that on Wednesday. I had a carnal thought, and all I could think was the song, "dont worry about a thing, cos every little things, gonna be all right!!" Just keep following Him, and it's going to be ok!!! And today being Easter, while the rest of the "religious" world celebrates His rising again, I was thankful that He IS alive, and will be for the rest of forever.
The reason I put it the way I do, is that some say He lives, the tomb is empty, yet they wear a cross. I do not understand why the cross.... yes, He died, but HE LIVES for crying out loud!!! He's no longer on the cross... and I believe the "religious" world views that on one day only. It's so sad.
However, I know He lives, today, tomorrow, and the rest of forever. And I woke up thinking of today, and the rememberance of His rising again, and it makes me so thankful. I am so thankful for the cross, and what that symbolizes to me today. He didn't have to take all the pain and suffering like He did, but "when He was on the cross, I was on His mind" and He did it for me! He went through all the pain, suffering, shame, and everything, FOR ME! wow. it's so amazing. He did it for me. It makes me wanna cry with tears of thanks.... That He loves me enough, to die. and suffer. and go through the shame and pain. for me. and knowing that He cares enough to come die for me, and not just die, but rise again, so I can live for eternity, and knowing that He's got it all under control, as He holds the whole world in His hands, EVERY LITTLE THING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT!!! Things are still not the way I want them, but oh well. It's called "LIFE" and that's just how its going to be. Until God sees fit to change my situation, I'm just going to be here, and be happy about it. In a way, I want things different, and in a way, I don't. I'm not going to go into details, I just know what I need to know, and that is every little things gonna be alright!!! And He is in control, and I just need to remember that. I've been feeling way better since being reminded of this.
Another bit of exciting news happened this week for me. I have a friend from CALI who knew matthew, and everything that happened with that... and she told me this week, I was considered a hero to her. I tried to disagree with her... but she told me, going through what I had gone through at such a young age, and to still give God praise, she considered that hero status. I will say, that brought me to tears... she has gone through so much, and is an awesome lady, and to say that... it was shocking to me. and if she reads this, Ellie, you are the bomb! and I LOVE YOU GIRL!!! GOD's got it under control!!!!!
Well, I think that's about it for now. My brain has put itself in bed. haha. and i think it's time for my body to join it now. Hope y'all have a great week!!! and May God bless you!!!

sonia
that's all i have